How To Say "I'm Sorry"

The proper way to apologize is to state that you regret a specific offense. Offer to make amends or, if amends seem definitely called for, announce your intention of making amends as well as indicate how you will do this. If you're not sure how best to deal with the situation, describe several possible solutions and ask which the person prefers.

Assure the person that this will not happen again. In a business context, if it concerns a problem you were unaware of, thank the writer or caller for bringing it to your attention and finish the letter by asking for continued patronage. Do not be overly dramatic by using phrases such as ("You will probably never want to see me again after what I did," "I wish I were dead after the way I behaved last week," or "I am so, so, so sorry.").

When apologizing through writing, keep your letter free of guilt-inspired soul searchings and agonizing; it is uncomfortable and unappealing for the reader. State your apology clearly and briefly. Reread your apology to make sure you are not inadvertently implying that the other person is at fault; some people's "apology" sounds more like an accusation.

Especially in a business context, it is better not to write at all than to imply the customer is at fault. With a little ingenuity, it is possible to express regret about a situation without accepting responsibility for it if it's not your fault.

Don't blame clerical errors on computers ("A computer error/mishap was responsible for the delay in payments."). Most people are irritated by this excuse. In the same way, avoid saying that these things are bound to happen from time to time. Although this may be true, saying so indicates that the company policy may be more inclined to shrugs than vigorous action.

Avoid a grudging attitude; if you are going to apologize, do so cheerfully and wholeheartedly. Do not acknowledge that the company was negligent. If negligence is a factor, consult with your attorney, who will suggest the best approach to take in your letter.

4 Tips on writing a letter of apology:

1. Write as soon as possible after the incident. Be brief, straightforward, and sincere. Admit the fault straight away, apologize, and sign off. Remember to apologize only for the specific issue.

2. Avoid trying to justify or defend the error or behavior, although in some cases, an explanation could accompany your apology. At other times, however, an explanation may weaken or invalidate your apology. This is especially true when you try to explain why you were rude. In certain cases, a brief and sincere apology (maybe with flowers) is better than any explanation.

3. When apologizing for a business problem, the goal is to right the wrong (or the perceived wrong) while turning a dissatisfied customer into one who will continue to deal happily with you. Most customers will respect an honest, generous, and tactful response.

4.Mentally put yourself in the other person's place to determine the type of apology or other actions that would be appropriate if your positions were reversed.